A new life in Belize

Oh NO 50 – miami to keywest

I wanted to remember turning 50 by doing something out of the ordinary, so i made contact with Jim whom i’d met in the Dry Tortugas about 8 years , when he gave us a day sail on his boat to loggerhead key. He was excited to take us and two scallywags ,Sheila from Canada ( boat name Cockswain)  and Will from Georgia U.S.A ( boat name Craptin Sorely). Our boat names being H – Naughtycal Newton and mine bilge pumper, the plan was to get to T-shirts printed with the names on and go around keywest ..on reflection mine might have given the WRONG signal so I decided against it.

We all met up in Miami and stayed the night in the clarion suites. I asked Sheila to organise the room preferably close to the airport room with a view. We arrived before her and were over joyed with her excellent pick.


Now when planning the trip Will had a few reservations about what were the sleeping arrangements on the boat and privacy. We also planned to camp on the dry Tortugas ,i reckoned we needed an air mattress ,sleeping bag and tent . As we had a fully equipped boat, he started to make plans to ship his GEAR down and camp in his own “2 man”  tent. A little strange but we just let him get on with it, to make him feel at home and the fact he had never met Sheila before we set up a improvised tent in the hotel room so give him a little “privacy” , it was fashioned out of an ironing board and a bed spread and proved to be quite a hit with Will. Even though there was a spare queen bed sized !!!!

the start

We hired a car and drove down the through the keys arriving in keywest as the boat sailed into the marina next to Duval street. We dumped our gear on the boat and headed for a drink and quick bite in keywest …… this turned into a 24 hour bender ,Sheila being the main instigator of the debaucherous antics that followed. She wanted to experience the tastes, sights and ” smells”  of Duval Street ..and boy she SMASHED IT  !!!!!!!

We started of in BO’s fish wagon with grilled mahi mahi  to line our stomachs. This place is a keywest tradition rustic and great to hang out and watch the hoards of tourists passing on the sight seeing trams

bo's fish wagon

After a few drinks we decided to let Will and Sheila hang out a bit and get to know each other … Sheila has an eye for a photo and decided on this as an ice breaker. Will was unaware of what was written on the board below as he posed next to the large rooster.

cock fighting - Copy - Copy - Copy - Copy

We drank sensibly one every one drink every 30 mins and fitted another meal in at the hard rock cafe before having some more drinks as the sun was setting …at this point we were WELL GREASED  and decided that it was time to PASS THE CLOCK . The clock in keywest denotes straight bars on Duval , after that the gay bars start .

past the clock

Before we knew it we were in the bourbon 801 heading for the drag show upstairs .

bee's to the honey - Copybourbon 801 - Copy

Inside i met this tall lady who said she’d be gentle with me , after taking this photo i realised she had been lying … !!!!!!!

she said she'd be gentle - Copy squeal piggy squealsqueal piggy's - Copy - Copy

The night was coming to a close so we headed for the “garden of eden ” we have a photo somewhere which says strictly NO SEX on premises ..it felt a bit strange stood on the roof top garden listening to high energy dance tunes looking at the stars ,with the random guy stood in the corner bollock naked … BUT we were in keywest. Next Will looked at me with a glint in his eye and said lets go to the OTHER dance club ..so we headed off quite wobbly and before we knew it was in the RED GARTER gentlemans club unbeknowing to Sheila . No cameras are allowed inside so when i put the sign above her head TRAINEE PAWN STAR it got quite a laugh from everyone ..unfortunately no photo . We made it safely back to the boat and went to bed at 5am … rising at 7am for breakfast … swaggered over to harpoon harrys diner smashed a breakfast and set sail for t Boca grande ..aboard the regal Gitana.


Watch out for boca grande to dry tortugas  shortly !!!!!


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